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What Guides You?

Hey mama!

Happy Thursday! I hope y'all week has been stress-free or, for the most part, a little relaxed, and if not, I hope you kick back this weekend and get you a bottle of wine and enjoy the holiday weekend! I could sit here and complain to y'all about my week because, baby, this week has been trying me! I've probably wanted to quit at life and parenting probably 2,467 times, but we are not going to spread that negative energy; we will keep it positive today! I do have a story for y'all. Let's take it back to Valentines Day this year, I purchased hella balloons, and I decided after I was done lecturing my kids that we would take the balloons and think of something that we are holding on to, speak on it and then release the balloons outside. Great plan, right? So I gave my kids an example; for me, I tend to stress and have anxiety about things I have ZERO control over, so I'm attempting to release that energy....we are going to circle back around to this after I finish telling my story.

The star of this story is Alana. After I explained to the kids what to do, I asked them if they understood, they all said yes. About five minutes later, my oldest came back into the house and says, "Mommy Lana balloons got stuck in the tree, and she said what she wanted out loud." I instantly thought like damn, her negative energy trapped over the house (Picture above, LOL). I'm like, Jalen, what was it she wanted...Y'ALL...this fool asked for ROBUX! Mamas, I'm telling y'all I was dying of laughter on the inside; I couldn't keep a straight face! I'm like, let this be a learning lesson, kids; the universe ain't gonna give you what you don't deserve. Mama, I promise Lana was so outta pocket the week before and during Valentines week, so my little soul was tickled; her balloons got stuck, and I will have you know they were still there 3 weeks later. But to be honest, Alana’s birthday was coming up, so you better believe the odds were forever in her favor (read that in your Hunger Games voice) when it came to Robux, parenting at it's best, right? If you have been in this predicament then you already know the possibilities of folding are real! Anyway, now that I have finished my little story, let me circle back around to what I said about stressing over things we have ZERO control over.

Mama, let me tell you I should have a PH. D in stressing over things I have no control over. I mean, honestly, I am pretty over myself; it is ridiculous at times. I’ve had many times where I let stress trigger my anxiety which nine times out of ten always gets the best of me. I know I'm not the only mama that deals with this, and if I'm honest, sometimes it's self-induced, but I'm here to tell you, I GET IT, AND IT SUCKS! I've said it before in my post, and I'm going to say it again, mama we have a lot on our plate! This job is not for the weak! We worry so much about our children, home-life, husbands, wives, work, school, personal issues; it doesn't matter as women; we always find a way to worry (LOL). I believe the process of worrying costs us more than we realize. For starters, when you are focused on everything and everybody else, sometimes you feel like you are losing who you are in the process. How many of you can attest that you are worrying about things that you have zero power over or been in a place where you worry so much that you're watching life pass by? I know I have experienced this on multiple occasions.

Recently, I had a really good conversation with a friend of mine that I consider a sister; she always has words of wisdom for me. She asked me, "What do you REALLY control?" I had to stop and think because y'all, I usually have an answer for everything, but I didn't this time (I know, shocker!!!). But what she made me realize was that no matter how much I think I have control over a situation or my life, I don't! I have ZERO FUCKEN CONTROL! And to be honest, I spend a lot of time trying to control shit I have no power over (read that again). Last weekend I was so dedicated to stressing about things I couldn't control it triggered my anxiety. Mama if you have ever experienced stress-induced anxiety, then you know it can feel like paralysis at times; no matter how hard you try to get up and move about your day, you can't. Throughout the years, I realized I have minutes to change the way I am thinking, and if I don't I will be lying in bed all day traveling down worry lane; for me, it's usually personal matters, but nonetheless, it SUCKS! As I am writing this post, I realized I have given so much energy to things I can't control I barely have time to live my life.

As women, I believe we can all agree we are exceptional at making scenarios up in our head and running with it, and if you don't do this well, baby, you’re missing out (JK). We've all been that person that lets our worry get the best of us; it happens, don't beat yourself up over it, okay? Okay. I'm going to ask you the same question my friend asked me "Are you going to be afraid to live because all these things COULD happen, or are you going to just live your life?" Mama really think about that question, once you have your answer hold on to that and always refer back to it! I say all this to say it's okay to worry about your children, home life, or yourself but don't get carried away because it is easy to travel down a path of worry and get lost in it. So my advice is don't let your stress, anxiety, and, most importantly, fear guide you. We can't control everything that happens in our lives, let alone our children's lives but what you can control is your thought process and what you allow to guide it. I can't tell you I have it all figured out because I don't, but what I can tell you is that I am a little more aware and do my best not to feed my fears and anxiety; it's a continual practice for me because its not something you can change overnight. Still, I can tell you this if you can alter your mindset and not focus too much on what you can't control, I can guarantee you will feel a sense of relief. We all have to start somewhere, and I'm here with you taking one day at a time!

So today, mama, I challenge you to take that one thing in your life that you are trying to control and let go of it, and I'll do the same! As always, peace and blessings!



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Jul 01, 2021

I loved this! Because its so true. I know I struggle with this as well. That's why every morning I get up play my 2 favorite meditation songs, release whatever doesn't serve me and go on bout my day. When I hit a bump in the road or something stressful comes my way I stop take a few deep breaths, and refocus. Because if not I will easily slip into a depressive state of mind and I don't like that feeling. Thanks for this post Devon! 🥰

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